Rise of the Angry Marines
by sks303
Summary: The Story of one of the most Bat-Sh1t Insane Legions in the Imperium of Man.
1. Chapter 1

"FFFFUUUUCCCCKKKK YYYYOOOOUUUU" I Roared to no one.

I had just beaten Warhammer 40k Spess Mahreen on my Xbox 360 when the stupid Inquisitor took away Capitan Titus because of that stupid load of horse-humping shit Leandros (Wimp).

"YOU STUPID ARSEHOLE" I Yelled as I threw my controller against the wall breaking it into a pile of wire, plastic and whatever-the-fuck-else-they-put-into-Xbox-360-controlers.

"Fucking thing" I Said to myself as i turned to pat my pet Tomcat. As soon as i came near she started to hiss and bolted out the door "The fuck?" I Said as i became aware of something burning.

As I turned again i noticed 3 things 1. my Xbox was on fire 2. the fire was Purple 3. IT WAS FLOATING 4 FEET OFF THE FUCKING FLOOR.

"WHAT THE FUCK" I Yelled as it exploded knocking me against the wall(Also destroying my TV, DVD player, Stereo System and my Massive Heavy Metal Collection)

The one thing I noticed before i passed out was that a pitch black portal opened in the air where the xbox was.

The last thing I saw was a bunch of shadows fall out of it before i passed out.


	2. Da Pepelz

"Vot zee fek happened" I said as I woke up.

"HOLY SHIIIT" I roared as I looked at the shear amount of damage my exploding X-Box caused. My music collection had been uterrly obliderated by the blast along with my TV, Stero System and this was not the worst part as a bunch of Lunitics start to tear my room apart in there struggle to kill each other. I instantly recognised them all. The first I saw was Warboss Grimskull who was ripping the limbs off a Keeper of Secrets. The second was a Dark Eldar Archon and his bodyguards engaged in combat with a Eldar Farseer. next was Kaos Lord Nemaroth beating that retarded inquistor to death with some METAL BAWKSES. Wait FUCK that was my computer setup. Shit. The 4th group was a Impireal Guard Command Squad battleing a Cannoness.

Seeing that they were too busy trying to kill each other to notice me as i sneaked up the stairs to my rather spartan room only to be caught in the middle of a horrific melee between some Necron Flayed Ones acomponeid by a Necron Lord agenst a large group of Kroot. Of corse I managed sneak past but I suffered half a dozen slugs to the chest from the Kroot, luckily I was wearing my trusty bullet-proof vest but I nearly had my balls blown off from a shot by the Necron Lord as i bolted down the hallway to the garage where i kept most of my weapons.

Bolting into the garage i found a moment of peace as there was nobody trying to kill each other. I then tore open my metal-plated chest as I grabbed my trusty .45 Colt M1911A1, a Mosin-Nagant, and a Cigar. I lit my Cigar just as a Kroot came out of the fuckin wall before leaping at me I ducked as it (Quite stupidly) faceplanted on the edge of the still-open chest breaking its own stupid head open.

I was laughing as I ran up the stairs, only to get clotheslined by... A Banana Marine ?...wait-SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK! THATS MOTHERFUCKIN DORN OF THE BANANA MARINES I mean Impireal Fisting.. um Fists or something-or-rather. I never got a chance to insult him as his banana coloured boot fell toward my face making everything turn black.

Wait did that boot have an Luv U Br0 sticker on it ?

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Wooo! Review pe0pl3s


	3. A Blade in the Dark

Chapter 3: The White-Winged Death

Also I NEED A BETA READER TO HELP ME WITH THIS!

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"For fucks sake where the fuck am I" I said as I got up, the last thing I remembered was getting clotheslined by Rogal Dorn and then getting curb stomped "Fuck my life sucks" I said as I grabbed my rifle from where it had fallen on the floor. "Gotta find the Council" I murmured as I ran to the staircase. Leaping over the stairs, I quietly snuck around ninja style to the garage.

"Ooooooh fuuuuck" I quietly said as I looked around the corner only to find the King of Fister's giving a speech to a group of Terminators "~And so my sons our objective is clear, we must link up with both the Emperors Children and the Ultramarine's then we shall storm the monastery atop the mountain and bring 2nd Primach back into the Emperors fold and as a back up, several psykic 'Blanks' have infiltrated the monatery to nullify any psykic powers he has. FOWARDS MY BROTHERS, TO GLORY" He cried as they stormed out of the door: AKA a massive hole where the door should be.

As I turned around, trying not to make a sound I came face to face with Sigsimund-Rogal Dorn's right hand man/boyfriend/?. I quickly ducked to avoid a Power Sword to the face as I lashed out with my rifle, trying to jab him in the eye. However what I didnt count on was the Plasma Pistol in his other hand as he fired into my gut, blast out char grilled intestines and guts around the place as he smashed my skull in with a pistol whip.

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POV CHANGE MOTHERFUCKER!11!

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Pain.

Hatred.

Agony.

Sorrow.

These where all he felt as he opened his eyes.

A dark room coverd in blood with racks of torture tools.

On so many occasions they had tried to break him, to force him to spill all that he knew to them.

He tried to move but he could not as his limbs where impaled of spikes as he was inside one of there 'New' devices if he recalled it was called an 'Iron Maiden'.

He closed them again.


	4. Escape: Part 1

He awoke in silence as the adheric stench of bolter smoke and overcooked O-Zone filled his lungs. Gritting his teeth he pushed it off its hinges. Falling to the ground he picked up a nearby metal pipe as a pair of guards burst in through the door as he hauled himself back to his feet. "The prisoner is escaping" They cried. If he still had cheeks he would be smiling like the nyan cat. Almost immedently he charged caving in one of the guards skulls before reciving a axe-blow to his wing, almost making him cry out in pain. He grabbed the last guard be the throat before throwing him into the Iron Maiden, knocking the doors shut and tipping it over onto a fire making the guard scream in pain as he burnt to death.

He dropped the pipe to pick-up a flail on a nearby weapon rack just as a assault squad in Purple and Gold armour burst-in through the ceiling, sending broken masonary and corpse's falling to the ground. "The second Primach is here" They cried as one of them, clearly there leader dressed in ornate armor with a billowing red cloak over his left shoulder and a wing opon his right, walked towards him with arms outstreached ".

To be honest, he could not give a rats arse about this piss-ant and his bullshit about the "2nd Primach". As soon as he came withen striking distance he lashed out with his flail, smashing him out cold and sending him flying. The others that followed him turned thier mutitude of weapons towards him as he picked up a nearby corpse and used it as a meat shield, the bolts and plasma blast's smashing harmlessly into it.

Throwing the ruined corpse away he leaped behind a pillar as another mob of guards came in via the door buying him enough time to leap out of the window falling 69 story's to the ground...

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Yeah Yeah its a short chapter but wait till the 2nd Primach gets a Assault Cannon and watch the fun begin...

Also check out my deviantart:


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